I did not choose to be born White any more than my Black brothers and sisters chose to be born Black. None of us were offered any sort of choice befor birth. Our major differences do not have as much to do with our color as with our cultures.
First cultural point I find most troubling is that this discussion always gets the term race to distinguish between those with slave ancestors and “the rest of us” by the simple identification of skin color.
Second, the idea that Blacks be classified as a less than human sub species.This idea was created using very bad science by the ruling slave holders of the day. It simply has no foundation in Truth. The truth is that there is only one race for which the technical, scientific term is homo-sapient. The general term is the Human Race and we are all equal members. The slaver society needs that distinction to justify their behavior. The only genetic difference between white and black people is that whites don’t produce as much melenin in their skin as blacks. How does this deficiency make whites superior?
Declaring the false premise that Blacks are a genetically inferior race as true, gives whites authority over Blacks. More than that it declares this relationship is grounded in unchangeable genetics of the race and is therefore the correct relationship between the “races”. Since there is only one race, all skin colors, eye colors, hair colors, body types; all are equally human!. None of the characteristics Blacks possess are reasons to ignore their humanity. What is actually in play is the interaction between a culture developed under slavery that is technically free but still being controlled by the white society that previously enslaved them. Those children of slavers were raised by slaveholder parents, some who felt they should maintain their control over their ex-slaves, passing on subtle, and not so subtle behaviors that would keep them in their proper social position while the rest of the population was glad to rid of slavery and dreamed some of the same dreams of equality as their recently freed slaves. The bible was their guide and they did the best they could to teach their children to apply the golden rule to all peoples. But our Roman based republic is a complex conditioning machine that teaches the population many falsehoods that are designed to keep us enslaved to the rich and powerful. Dividing us into sub-groups in a competitive rather than a cooperative way gives the illusion of the problem being between us rather than the truth that it is built into the social structures.
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I grew up during the civil rights movement and was raised by parents who taught me, and clearly believed all humans are equal in the eyes of the creator. I grew up thinking we were fixing the problem. My earliest memory that segregation was real and wrong was when I was with my mother at the downtown Sears Robuck Store. I could not under­stand why there was a water fountain labled white and another marked colored. This was 1954 and I was 7 years old. When I asked my mother why there were the two different water fountains she had no adequate answer for me or herself. Her explanation was basically it made both sides more comfortable to have that separation. The fact of the matter is that my mother probably had already come the same conclusion I did. The separate water fountains were a way to remind blacks that even though they were technically free, whites still controled their lives. My mother had no way to explain this even if she really understood it. Talking about slavery was forbiddin. A socially unacceptable topic of discussion. Those dual fountains went away in the next renovation of the store but the beliefs that created them did not..
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I came to a full realization of this fact only recently.
When I heard a relatively afluent back poliatition explain what he had to teach his son to keep from being shot by the police. It literally made me feal sick when I realized how much diffent our lives would be if I had been forced to raise my son in that same way. The problems is being discussed in terms of institutional racism and the fact that the very found­ation of our country, the constitution, declares specifically that Black men and Indians were to be counted as less than a white man. This is the foundation of Institutional racism.
Given that the Founding Fathers were slave holders, who may already have seen the end of slavery coming in the future, felt the need to politically protect themselves. They set those reduced values as curbs to the freed slave’s use of the rights they would aquire by being granted their freedom. The intellectual discussion of what could go wrong in our Democracy was, instead centered around the danger of an uninformed electorate. We have seen the results of this culminate in the election of a president who’s only acts as president was to praise white supremisy and grab as much wealth for himself and his political cronies as he could. If we aren’t careful the ex slavers could actually turn our government into an Authoritarian dictatorship. They came very close to
taking the whole thing down.
My generation was mangled in our attempts to end the corrupt practices that arbitrarily made some folks less powerful than others. As a result of the corruption designed into its opperation of every level we failed. Our failure to make any substantive improvent in the corrupt institutions of our government is proof to me that we can not change our government from within. We must make the change on the social side of things that are not controled by the corrupt government
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The problem that is more subtle and more dangerous are the Ideas and behaviors that are taught by our society as being loving, supportive actions, are, in fact oppress­ive, domineering and even evil when experienced by a Black woman or man. I have a personal experience with this form of cultural miss understanding. In the last years of my work for the State of Florida we had a wonderful black woman for a receptionist. She allready had my respect for the way that she managed a family, husband and the care of an aging mother while working full time and working on a masters degree at the same time. I was, needless to say, impressed with her.
As The State will often take the chores of a recently emptied position and distribute the tasks among the remaining positions in the the department, she was the recipient of one of these tasks and I was tasked with showing her how to perform this new task. The office was organised in oppen cubbies with her’s facing the entry to the rooms with room for her chair and a bit of room for me to stand behind her. The open nature of the office made the idea of a closer tighter comunication path seem to be a desirable goal. So in an effort to accomplish cleaner comunication I leaned down over her shoulder to be able to speak softly into her ear. Well she “blew up’ at me saying something about my not being her mother. We went to our separate corners and after some time for us to cool off a bit I went back to her and gently asked if she would explain to me what it was about my action that offended her so much. She was very kind in exploring to me that it was a dominance maneuver that was use by the slave holder to pin the slave in place and force them to listen to the slaver’s commands. It was so effective that Black moms use it to communicate a command to a child, which is only allowed when talking to a child as a parent. Using the maneuver on an adult is therefore an unacceptable behavior for quite obvious reasons. I had been taught a domineering behavior as if it was a useful loving behavior in stead of the hateful demeaning behavior it actually represents. I ‘m sure my mother was told this was a loving gesture but instead it is seen as a demeaning control behavior. Somewhere down the line of my ancestors this behavior was taught to children as a method of control. Sometime between then and now it was falsly identified as loving behavior. Understanding that this is demeaning to a Black person clearly identifies this behavior as racist that is nothing to do with race but is rooted in the cultural difficulties with a culture rooted in over too years of slavery and the echos of slave holding still present in white culture. As a result of this education our friendship became a closer one, and we have stayed in communication after my retirement. in the present.
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I hope that my experience presents a solution to what might be identified as cross cultural ignorance is a better understanding of the behaviors that have the unintended consequence of being percieved as racist across this cultural divide. These perceptions of racism are present on both sides of the cultural divide. The solution is in the communication of truths held by each culture and more importantly determine and remove those behaviors that foster hatred and miss trust in the larger society. The best way to do this is to identify and remove them from the social dialogue.
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My experience as I see it informed me of one small bit of racist behavior. I can not believe that this is not the only such behavior that I have been taught that is not equally or even more racist than the one I learned about from this one exper­ience. I have to believe that the dialogue with my receptionist friend will likely bring me a better understand­ing of our two cultures and ways we can live together with respect and equality. Find a person from the culture not your own to act as a coach counselor. Ask that they point out the behaviors of yours that are offensive or demeaning, but in a loving fashion rather than one of antagonism and distrust. As important as this conversatio will be the understand will be incomplete untill those truths learned are shared with the rest of your cultural group. One of the other things I have come to understand is just how segregated our society still is. I live in an Intentional Community of around 100 families. In our youth the community had one Black family who moved out when fire damaged their home and the insurance would not pay to repair the damage done by the fire (clearly a bit of institutional racism).  Since then we have had only one renter who is black. Our neighbors in the larger community are rural Black and White mixed areas but still highly segregated. I got past this barrier by accidentally finding a friend at work who could help me understand our cultur­al differences and learn to ditch those negative behaviors that continue to create problems for both cultures. Racism is a false concept we can only defeat with mutual understanding and a  return to the principle of Love Thy Neighbor. All people are our neighbors. All people are equal.